Horror Movie OctoberFest: Round 1

April Fool's Day - 6/10

Yes, yet another 80's slasher movie for a holiday. Those crazy 80's folks missed Yom Kippur. The film is very, very predictable but there's a great sense of fun in the ongoings, particularly at the start. The guests are arrived and are subjected to the rich girl's high jinx. Once those dwindle off, the film goes into standard slasher fare and on to the predictable outcome. It is not very scary, but most of the film is clever, with tongue in cheek fun thrown in. An instantly forgettable cast, not a "they were in this?" among them, are at least convincing.



I Spit On Your Grave - 7/10

This film, also called Day of the Woman, is infamous for frequently being called "the worst film ever made" by Roger Ebert. Others weren't as harsh upon its initial release and since the film's 26 years in existence it has gained a large cult following. The film bares more than a passing resemblance to Wes Craven's Last House on the Left. The first hour you watch in horror as a woman is beaten, raped, teased, and bloodied up, then the same thing all over again. About four times. It is not a pleasant experience and at times feels like a snuff film. The woman eventually makes it back to her cabin and waits a few weeks to exact her revenge on the hillbillies and then the film turns exploitation. The low art genres crisscross creating something unexpectedly watchable (sorry, Roger!) and something that would look at home in a Quentin Tarantino DVD library.



Nattevagten / "Nightwatch" - 5/10

German thriller about a grad student who takes a night job at a morgue as a series of murders go down that make him look like the killer. The morgue itself has atmosphere to spare, but unfortunately the film doesn't do quite enough with the setting. Most of it seems cliched and the whodunit element leads to another "talking killer" scenes that have become so standard with the genre. The identity of the killer is a surprise, however, but is unveiled far too early in the film to have as much punch as it should have. The film was remade by the same director into 1998's Nightwatch, starring Ewan McGregor, Patricia Arquette, Nick Nolte and Lauren Graham. I would have also Netflix'd the the remake based soley on the last name, but since it is from the same director and all the reviews that outline the plot make it sound exactly like its inspiration.



Resident Evil: Apocalyse - 5/10

I enjoyed this film, I was entertained throughout it. If it were in late night cable some time in the next few years, I will watch it. Hell, I meant rent it. Does this make it a good movie? Not at all. Its junk food: delicious, juicy and completely bad for you. Is it a guilty pleasure? I don't really like that term, as I think that you should feel guilty for what you like. The film is overly directed. Every scene begins and ends in music video style which is very tiring. Plot holes are instantly spotted. It has the token black guy, something that desperately needs to be axed in the genre. No shot lasts longer than 5 seconds. Yet, I had fun. I guess I love the zombie genre too much. Milla Jovovich kicks major ass as a mini-Sigourney, and I would to see her tackle a real role in the future. Sienna Guillory is pretty good with what she has to do but is probably here because Kate Beckinsale was busy doing some other gothic shit. The film's quality makes it a 3, while I enjoyed it as a 7. I gave it a 5.



The Wicker Man - 7/10

Even after 32 years, The Wicker Man's message, surreal imagery (gotta love those animal masks!) and bizarreness still stack up today. A horror film that isn't, it is about an investigator's search for a missing, possibly dead girl among a very strange town. How strange are they? Well, in the film's best bit, a very naked, very blonde and very dubbed Brit Eckland dances around naked while singing a song to seduce the investigator who is in a different room. This whole scene is just so out of nowhere that I had no other way to react to it than laughter. (Not in a bad way, mind you.) That number will stay with you for days. I wasn't expecting musical to play such an integral part in the film, but there's several other tunes in the mix. The film's power hits hard at the great ending, which I won't spoil. Despite the film's originality and curiousity it inspires in the viewer, I felt very detached from the events and found myself not caring for what was going on. Despite this, the whole story is very relevant today. So much so that a remake was in development several years back that would have starred Nicolas Cage, Angelina Jolie (I'm hoping in the Eckland part) and Winona Ryder. Ryder's role is a mystery as several other female characters are in this story, but none of their roles were substantial enough to earn that kind of talent. Perhaps the plan was to make the part of Rowan Morrison a woman instead of a young girl.