Friday, September 8, 2006

Entertainment Weekly's 50 Best Teen Movies EVER!

Given how much I love teen movies, I thought I'd post this!


50. Splendor in the Grass 1961
Young love — especially when it's with the star of the football team — can make a girl crazy. Literally. In pre-Depression, small-town Kansas, good-girl Natalie Wood is so tortured by her sexual urges for beau Warren Beatty and conflicting pressure to be moral that she attempts suicide after a school dance and ends up in a sanitarium. It's the ultimate depiction of overwhelming first love, and — sorry, religious right — a chilling PSA against the dangers of teen abstinence. — Josh Wolk

49. Sixteen Candles 1984
It's tough to turn 16. But when your entire family forgets your birthday, it only makes that day worse. Molly Ringwald puts on a brave face as her character endures basically the worst week of her life, whether it's having her panties taken by Anthony Michael Hall or getting groped by her grandma (''Fred, she's gotten her boobies!''). The awkwardness is all hilarious, though, especially watching a young Joan Cusack attempt to use the water fountain in orthodontic head gear. — Tim Stack

48. Just One of the Guys 1985
Every generation has its variant on the girl-dresses-as-boy, girl-as-boy-falls-for-boy, boy-freaks-out tale. And this immensely fun, if minor, romp from the '80s perfectly captures the decade's raunch-lite spirit and funky fashion sense. As the cross-dresser caught in the middle, Joyce Hyser's aspiring journalist learns the hard way that there's more to being a dude than just stuffing a tube sock down your pants. — Michelle Kung

47. Napoleon Dynamite 2004
The plot is insignificant, the lead character (Jon Heder) is a petulant spaz, and the pace creeps along just barely faster than a John Deere. Still, this sleeper hit succeeds because it manages to mock and celebrate high school geekdom with a bone-dry, unsentimental tone. The inane one-liners, absurd non sequiturs, and sheer stupidity of the characters don't just bring back memories of adolescence, they make you feel like a teenager again, giggling at something idiotic without knowing exactly why. — Michael Endelman

46. Flirting 1992
She's a Ugandan beauty in a prep school populated by blond Aussies (including young Nicole Kidman and Naomi Watts); he's a gawky stutterer obsessed with Camus. Given their shared outsider status at their respective institutions, is there any doubt that Danny (Noah Taylor) and Thandiwe (Thandie Newton) end up falling for each other? Wryly tender and respectfully told, director John Duigan's coming-of-age romance is a warm and fuzzy confection that stops short of being icky. — Michelle Kung


45. My Bodyguard 1980
There's something timeless for everyone when new kid Clifford ''Peachy'' Peache (Chris Makepeace) enlists the mysterious, tortured class psycho (Adam Baldwin) to protect him from the school bully (Matt Dillon). Lifelong scapegoats will cheer the underdogs' triumph, while former home-room villains of all generations will shed a nostalgic tear at Dillon's showcase of evergreen bully tactics: the locker prison, the wet toilet-paper bomb, the bathroom surprise attack. Ahhh, high school: good times, good times. — Josh Wolk

44. Can't Hardly Wait 1998
It's the last night of high school and the only thing left to do is party — and face the skeletons in the closet. By the end of this crazy bash, everyone succeeds: The nerd gets revenge on the jock, the nice guy snags his prom-queen crush, and a pair of unlikely old friends reunite. It may be a typical teen comedy, but the underlying message always rings true: Don't let fate pass you by. — Lindsay Soll

43. Stand and Deliver 1988
Any grandiose ''O Captain! My Captain!'' speech would only invite a Dead Teacher's Society beatdown at dilapidated Garfield High in East L.A. Instead, Jaime Escalante (Edward James Olmos) teaches in a fast-food-worker uniform and inspires with math problems about gigolos. He gives extra textbooks to a studious gangbanger (Lou Diamond Phillips) in exchange for protection, and turns a mathematical truth, ''A negative times a negative equals a positive,'' into a social one. That's ganas, jefe. — Jeff Labrecque

42. Fame 1980
By today's standards, this Oscar-winning musical is downright gritty, with its frank and often bleak depiction of arts-inclined teenagers. Sure, they sing and act and turn lunchtime into a funk jam, but they also have abortions, fend off predatory pornographers, experiment with drugs, and contemplate suicide. High School Musical, it isn't. The potent shot of authenticity is sweetened by the memorable, soul-drenched musical numbers, which inspired millions to try and pirouette on a taxi. — Michael Endelman

41. Can't Buy Me Love 1987
Before he was Dr. McDreamy on Grey's Anatomy, Patrick Dempsey won us over as the lovable lawn-mowing nerd Ronald Miller. After a failed attempt to buy his way into the cool clique, Ronny goes from totally chic right back to a total geek. Lesson learned: Sometimes performing the ''African Ant Eater Ritual'' at the school dance isn't enough to get you a spot at the right lunch table. — Lindsay Soll

40. Risky Business 1983
Long before Tom Cruise became a couch-jumping Scientologist, he came to prominence in this sharp satire of privileged suburban teens. The socks-and-undies dance scene is what everyone remembers, but this Reagan-era hit isn't just another teensploitation flick. It's about the soul-crushing pressure to be perfect, and the primal urges to rebel against a manicured, pre-programmed future — even if that means turning your parents' house into a brothel. — Michael Endelman

39. The Virgin Suicides 2000
This one deserves to be on the list if only for the one terrific shot in which Josh Harnett, as heartthrob Trip Fontaine, glides down the locker-lined hall, with his leather jacket hung over one shoulder and Heart's ''Magic Man'' blaring on the soundtrack as all the girls turn their heads. If guys in high school don't actually walk like that, they should. The rest of the movie, about gorgeous sisters in a death pact, is shot by debut director Sofia Coppola as teenage iconography at its dreamiest and most weirdly entrancing. — Gregory Kirschling

38. Bye Bye Birdie 1963
High school is definitely more fun when you add a little song and dance. Ann-Margret is all big hair and energy as a lucky small-town teen who wins the chance to be kissed on television by Conrad Birdie, a thinly veiled Elvis copy. Unfortunately, her boyfriend is a tad jealous of her swapping spit with a celeb. What follows is a gleeful parade, perfect for viewers who always wanted to meet the high school star crush whose posters adorned their bedroom walls. — Tim Stack

37. Friday Night Lights 2004
Is there a sight more wonderful than kids playing a sport just for the sheer love of the game? That's a vision entirely absent from Peter Berg's superbly unsparing, based-on-real-events examination of the diamond-forming pressure present in small-town-Texas high school football. A great teen movie and a great sports movie, albeit one that may prompt more than one young ballplayer to switch to darts. — Clark Collis

36. Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire 2005
No, we haven't lost our minds. One of J.K. Rowling's ingenious ideas was to blend two literary traditions, fantasy and coming-through-school fiction (à la Tom Brown's School Days). That's particularly true in Goblet, which depicts 14-year-old Harry's heightened state of adolescent anxiety, about the big (Quidditch) game, about finding a date for the big dance, and about juggling homework while saving the wizard world from evil Lord Voldemort. — Thom Geier

35. Brick 2006
''Nah, bulls gum it. They'd flash their dusty standards at the wide-eyes, probably find some yeg to pin.'' The high school kids in Brick talk like this for the entire movie. With a femme fatale, a dead girlfriend, and a mysterious cape-wearing drug lord, Brick gives you a teen flick in the guise of a noir thriller where everything is all very life-and-death. Come to think of it, that's exactly what high school is like. — Gilbert Cruz

34. Get Real 1999
A typical first-love-with-the-school-jock story, but with a twist. ''Sex on legs'' track star John Dixon (Brad Gorton) really does fall for Steven Carter (Ben Silverstone), the bright, gawky student journalist who's lusted after Dixon while tiptoeing around female classmates on platonic dates. Of course, Dixon also has an official girlfriend. But when our hero yearns for a romance that's a little more public, the baton gets dropped in a way that's touchingly, poignantly real. — Thom Geier

33. Hoop Dreams 1994
This documentary follows William Gates and Arthur Agee, two kids who avoid the pitfalls of growing up in the Chicago slums by living, breathing, and playing basketball. As with any kid who plays ball, Gates and Agee fantasize about one thing: making it to the NBA. For all audiences, this is a purely inspirational tale. For some, it's nostalgic, bringing back dreams you once had of making it to the pros. — Vanessa Juarez

32. Scream 1996
Aside from the awesomeness of seeing Henry ''The Fonz'' Winkler as a square principal, Scream is the supreme teen horror movie specifically because it is so self-aware of how ridiculous and formulaic teen horror movies can be — even those that are set outside of high school, in college dorms or summer camps. And if sex equals death, as fright flicks and parents alike have tried to warn us, then how cool is it (spoiler alert!) for Scream to make the killer Neve Campbell's boyfriend — the one trying to get in her pants? Scary cool, we say. — Gilbert Cruz

31. The Karate Kid 1984
We practiced ''the crane'' and wasted money on a Bonsai tree. But the real reason this movie makes the cut: Rocky director John G. Avildsen understood that Mr. Miyagi (late Oscar nominee Pat Morita) had a lot to say — about finding balance, about choosing mentors wisely, about disguising defensive martial-arts techniques in home improvement (and yourself in a shower curtain, if it meant you could attend your high school Halloween dance undetected by Cobra Kai bullies). Perhaps that explains why only one of Daniel-san's training sessions is set to music: When Miyagi talked, we, like outsider Ralph Macchio, listened. — Mandi Bierly

30. Bring It On 2000
They're sexy, they're cute, they're popular to boot! Kirsten Dunst plays Torrance, the bright-eyed cheerleading captain who must save her high school's squad from a major cheeragedy: going down as the team who stole routines. In the end, we learn there's more to cheerleading than loads of hairspray, teeny halter tops, and back-stabbing: These are athletes who know how to really bring it. We give this comedy five spirit fingers up! — Lindsay Soll

29. Gregory's Girl 1982
Gregory's Girl is short on stars, long on soccer, and it sounds like a Weird Al Yankovic parody of Rick Springfield. But it is also sweetly hilarious as gangly Scottish teen Gregory (Gordon John Sinclair) falls for an out-of-his-league girl. The result is guaranteed to make viewers feel much better about their own post-pubescent awkwardness — unless they, too, ever tried to romance someone with the information that ''When you sneeze, it comes out your nose 180 miles an hour.'' — Clark Collis

28. Back to the Future 1985
A.K.A. the coolest movie ever to feature a Huey Lewis and the News song. The film ingeniously literalizes high school's sexual frustration and disdain for one's parents by having Michael J. Fox's Marty McFly getting hit on over and over again by Lea Thompson as his young, future mother (thanks to that time-traveling DeLorean). It just goes to prove that the parental units were just as horny back in the day as we were. — Gilbert Cruz

27. To Sir, With Love 1967
Way before Mr. Holland began teaching his opus and Michelle Pfeiffer was molding dangerous minds, Sidney Poitier was taming a room of unruly British teens with his real-life lessons and tough-love tactics (a boxing glove to the stomach, anyone?). Having himself played an insubordinate kid in 1955's Blackboard Jungle, the student masterfully becomes the teacher in this sappy but never maudlin tale of inspiration and tolerance. — Michelle Kung

26. Pretty in Pink 1986
Perhaps the most controversial ending to a teen romance ever. (Behind Romeo and Juliet? Fine.) Should Andie (Molly Ringwald) have chased after rich, repentant Blane (Andrew McCarthy), or stayed at the prom with poor, devoted Duckie (Jon Cryer)? That we, women now in our 30s, still care is a testament to John Hughes' script about love across class lines (point for Blane); the meaning of friendship and individuality (point for Duckie); and the evil nature of wealthy high schoolers in crisp, white clothing (point for James Spader). — Mandi Bierly

25. Hoosiers 1986
Most school movie jocks are belligerent bullies. But Jimmy Chitwood (Maris Valainis) is part Larry Bird, part Rain Man, letting the swish of the basketball net do his talking. Hoops-crazed Hickory, Ind., adores him for it. His support of embattled Coach Dale (Gene Hackman) sways the town, and his skill transforms Dale from goat to genius. In the championship game, the Brylcreemed god overrules Dale's last-second strategy with three words: ''I'll make it.'' Definitely. — Jeff Labrecque

24. Rushmore 1998
For some reason, Rushmore doesn't quite feel like a high school movie. Maybe that's because director/co-writer Wes Anderson's wonderful comedy doesn't feel like any other movie ever made. But it's about school days: Just the fact that Jason Schwartzman's tirelessly enterprising Max Fischer is a student at all becomes palpably bittersweet, since he's too young to ever win Olivia Williams, the teacher of his (and anyone's) dreams. — Gregory Kirschling

23. Cooley High 1975
Written by Good Times co-creator Eric Monte and directed by Michael Schultz, this tearjerker provided the blueprint for Boyz N the Hood. In mid-'60s Chicago, geek Leroy ''Preach'' Jackson (Glynn Turman) and hoop star Richard ''Cochise'' Morris (Lawrence-Hilton Jacobs) struggle to stay out of trouble while prepping for graduation. The soundtrack, featuring G.C. Cameron's ballad ''It's So Hard to Say Goodbye to Yesterday,'' remains as beloved as the film. — Margeaux Watson

22. American Pie 1999
A frivolous teen comedy that left its mark: Jason Biggs taught us the dangers of webcam misuse (and baked-goods abuse), while the guy who'd become Harold — or was it Kumar? — popularized the term MILF. Pie was both funnier and bawdier than Porky's, though that 1981 romp gets points for Kim Cattrall's outrageous orgasm scene. But even she can't top Alyson Hannigan's perfect delivery of the line (all together now): ''This one time? At band camp?'' — Hannah Tucker

21. Grease 1978
Still the top-grossing film musical ever, Grease may look too pure to be ''pink,'' but listen to those lyrics (and watch John Travolta ogle Olivia Newton-John in ''You're the One That I Want'') and you may find yourself blushing. Beneath the karaoke-heaven soundtrack lies a story with teen pregnancy, ''pussy wagons,'' and a TV personality trying to put an aspirin in a girl's Coke. Naughty but harmless, it's just like high school should be. — Mandi Bierly

20. Dead Poets Society 1989
Perhaps the finest movie in a shockingly sparse mini-genre: the high school weepie. (After all, high school makes you cry sometimes.) Here, if Robert Sean Leonard's suicide doesn't get you (''My son! My son!''), then the ending — Ethan Hawke's stirring ''O Captain! My Captain!,'' Maurice Jarre's blaring bagpipes, and teacher Robin Williams' ''Thank you, boys, thank you'' — will. Only somebody too cool for school could resist. — Gregory Kirschling

19. The Last Picture Show 1971
Peter Bogdanovich's black-and-white film takes us to the tumbleweed burg of Anarene, Tex., where Jeff Bridges, Timothy Bottoms, and Randy Quaid vie for Cybill Shepherd, the town's No. 2 seductress. (Her mom's No. 1.) These horny, angst-ridden teens deal with sex, mortality, money, and a li'l Texas football by being themselves: subconsciously callous. But the witty banter, mostly by the grown-ups, makes it all less bleak. — Vanessa Juarez

18. Rock 'n' Roll High School 1979
Producer Roger Corman's comedy is a jiggly love affair set at Vince Lombardi High and centered on matchmaker Eaglebauer (Clint Howard), whose office is a men's room stall, and ''Riff Randell, rock & roller'' (pre-Stripes hottie P.J. Soles), who must rebel against Principal Togar (Mary Woronov) to see a forbidden — and very excellent — Ramones show. Think Spinal Tap and Dazed and Confused skipping study hall together to get stoned. — Jason Adams

17. Peggy Sue Got Married 1986
Would you change anything if you could relive high school? Possibly hook up with that beatnik of a guy you always wondered about? Until Chevrolet makes an actual plutonium-powered time machine, we'll have to live vicariously through this humorously goofy Francis Ford Coppola flick, in which Peggy Sue (Kathleen Turner) goes back in time to figure out whether pompadoured heartthrob Charlie (Nicolas Cage) is her one and only. — Vanessa Juarez

16. Lucas 1986
Sure, sensitive jock Charlie Sheen ends up shirtless for seven minutes due to a freak blender accident in Home Ec. But we remember Lucas for its smart scrawny hero (an affecting Corey Haim), who showed that the strongest kid is the one who walks through the halls knowing he'll be teased. And that the most interesting person finds beauty where he can — even in the sewer system, sitting beneath a manhole cover, listening to a live symphony above. — Mandi Bierly

15. Carrie 1976
School can be terrifying, especially when you're an awkward telekinetic teen whose mother is a loony religious zealot. Poor Carrie White can't even get through P.E. class without being viciously mocked by her peers. But in this Brian De Palma classic, the wallflower eventually gets her revenge in the spectacularly gory prom climax (even disposing of a Kotter-era John Travolta). Sissy Spacek's Oscar-nominated turn in the title role is pure, silent rage. — Tim Stack

14. Donnie Darko 2001
There are funnier high school movies, and ones with better soundtracks and more nostalgic value, but how many of those deal with time travel, alternate universes, fate, God, free will, therapy, censorship, teenage angst, falling airplane engines, pedophilia, and a scary freaking bunny? Point made. And while we still don't necessarily understand it all, few films deal so matter-of-factly with the sheer dread (both literal and metaphoric) of teen life. — Gilbert Cruz

13. High School 1968
Although it was added to the elite National Film Registry the same year as 2001 and Chinatown, Frederick Wiseman's documentary is — like many of his fly-on-the-wall nonfiction films — extremely difficult to find on video. But it is essential. Thirty years before reality TV, Wiseman took his camera to Philadelphia's Northeast High School and shot what was there, editing it, without narration, into a devastating indictment of bureaucracy and enforced conformity. — Gregory Kirschling

12. Mean Girls 2004
There was a time when Lindsay Lohan was best known for her acting rather than her party-hopping. Showcasing La Lohan in arguably her best role to date, this Tina Fey-scripted film also boasts a breakout turn by Rachel McAdams as evil queen bee Regina George (''Gretchen, stop trying to make 'fetch' happen! It's not going to happen!''). While Mean Girls is technically a comedy, its depiction of girl-on-girl cattiness stings incredibly true. — Tim Stack

11. Say Anything 1989
Go on: Hoist that boom box above your head and turn up ''In Your Eyes.'' Stand motionless with a fixed expression of unrequited but determined love. And watch Cameron Crowe's ode to young passion, which made John Cusack the thinking teen's heartthrob and should have done the same for Ione Skye. If the postgraduation romance between an earnest kickboxer and a sheltered valedictorian doesn't win you over, repeat steps one and two and listen closer. — Hannah Tucker

10. Ferris Bueller's Day Off 1986
Who didn't want to be Ferris in 12th grade? Who wouldn't want school to be a magical place where you could wake up and call in sick (with an awesome hacking-cough keyboard) and then see your name in a get-well-soon message painted on the side of a water tower by lunch, all while you were cruising through Chicago in a red Ferrari? Thanks to Matthew Broderick as Ferris, teenagerdom has never felt more fun or mythic. — Gregory Kirschling

9. Election 1999
Before taking on geezers (About Schmidt) and oenophiles (Sideways), director Alexander Payne in Election scabrously exposed the most embarrassing shortcomings of high schoolers in an artful, hilarious way. He doesn't go easy on anybody — not Matthew Broderick's weak, meddling teacher, nor Reese Witherspoon's Fargo-accented student-council-president candidate. In fact, Election is as mean as high school at its worst. - Gregory Kirschling

8. Boyz N the Hood 1991
Set in South Central Los Angeles, John Singleton's Oscar-nominated directorial debut revealed what it's like to come of age — and cram for the SATs — in a community plagued by crime, violence, and gang warfare. By contrasting the collegiate aspirations of bookworm Tre Styles (Cuba Gooding Jr.) and football star Ricky Baker (Morris Chestnut) with the self-destructive lifestyle of dropout/drug dealer Doughboy (Ice Cube), Boyz effectively pimped for education. — Margeaux Watson

7. Clueless 1995
It's a rare movie that makes you want to befriend the prettiest, most popular girl in school. But not all girls are Cher (Alicia Silverstone), who gets as many killer lines as fashion ensembles, learns that seeing the best in others is a way to better yourself, and discovers the joy of shopping with a well-dressed gay man — all at the ripe age of 15. Credit writer-director Amy Heckerling for making this modern-day Emma consistently smart and funny. — Mandi Bierly

6. American Graffiti 1973
Graffiti's cast of teens — including Richard Dreyfuss and Ron Howard — has serious decisions to make on a late-summer night filled with rock music and hot rods, the kind that can only be made if they stay up 'til dawn. Should they ditch town for college? Should they stay with their gals? Whatever the choice, it infuses this most innocently joyous eve-of-adulthood film with that bittersweet feeling of leaving one's childhood behind. - Gilbert Cruz

5. Heathers 1989
For those who dream about offing an obnoxious classmate, Heathers is the ultimate fantasy. Full of mordant wit, shocking violence, and savvy performances by Christian Slater and Winona Ryder, the flick was the antithesis of the earnest '80s John Hughes films — you'd never see Molly Ringwald serving up a kitchen-cleaner cocktail for Ally Sheedy. Even today, Heathers' spin on cliques, teen suicide, and homosexuality still has bite. - Tim Stack

4. Rebel Without a Cause 1955
''You're tearing me apart,'' Jim Stark (James Dean) howls at his parents. For the new kid in school, it doesn't get any easier. Though he finds a friend in the extremely troubled Plato (Sam Mineo), Stark gets into it on his first day with a gang of bullies, in a knife fight and later in a chickie run. Dean was a refreshing change from the well-scrubbed teens of earlier Hollywood films. Here was a character young audiences could finally recognize. — Vanessa Juarez

3. Dazed and Confused 1993
Matthew McConaughey's Wooderson likes high school girls because even though he gets older, they stay the same age. We feel the same way about Richard Linklater's minutiae-filled comedic epic about the last day of school in 1976 — we may get older, but Dazed is ageless. And for a movie featuring so many stoners, Dazed is mammothly ambitious: Few other films say as much about starting, sticking around in, and leaving high school. — Gregory Kirschling

2. Fast Times at Ridgemont High 1982
When screenwriter Cameron Crowe went undercover to observe the species Teenagerus americanus, he returned with more than the usual grab-bag of anecdotes about horny, apple-pie-humping guys and the popularity-obsessed girls who must fight them off with a stick. He returned with 24-karat truth. To watch Fast Times today is to know exactly what it felt like to be fixated on sex, drugs, and rock & roll in Southern California circa 1982. It also launched careers and dished out still-relevant life lessons: Jennifer Jason Leigh (relax your throat muscles when fellating a carrot), Phoebe Cates (always knock before entering a bathroom), and Judge Reinhold (see above). And Sean Penn's Jeff Spicoli, with his checkerboard Vans and bong-hit grin, was a geyser of catchphrases (''Aloha, Mr. Hand!''). The film never strains for coming-of-age treacle. Maybe that's why it still feels so...right. Especially Damone's sage advice: ''When it comes down to making out, whenever possible put on side one of Led Zeppelin IV.'' — Chris Nashawaty

1. The Breakfast Club
We see it as we want to see it — in the simplest terms, the most convenient definition: The Breakfast Club is the best high school movie of all time. It may lack the scope of its peers — the drinking, the driving, the listless loitering in parking lots — as well as any scenes that actually take place during school. But if hell is other people — and high school is hell — then John Hughes is the genre's Sartre, and this is his No Exit.

The concept is simple: one Saturday detention, five unhappy teens, and their scramble to prove they're each something more than a brain (Anthony Michael Hall), an athlete (Emilio Estevez), a basket case (Ally Sheedy), a princess (Molly Ringwald), and a criminal (Judd Nelson). Following the farcical fluff of Sixteen Candles, the issues Hughes explored — sex, drugs, abuse, suicide, the need to belong to something — were surprisingly subversive and handled with bracing, R-rated honesty. '''Kids movie' was a derogatory term,'' recalls Nelson, ''and Hughes was definitely not making that.'' Thus, 21 years later, the film still sparks intense debates about the trials of teen life. (Sheedy's goth freak gets a makeover, then gets the guy: well-earned happy ending or antifeminist propaganda? Discuss!)

Never mind the serious sociological stuff. The Breakfast Club rules because watching the group dismantle/ignore the authority of Principal ''Dick'' Vernon (Paul Gleason) is a vicarious thrill at any age. It rules because Simple Minds' ''Don't You Forget About Me'' is a kick-ass theme. Mostly it rules because, as Hall puts it: ''In the end, you learn maybe we're more alike than we realize, and that's kind of cool.'' Leave it to the neo-maxi-zoom-dweebie to get all cheesy. — Whitney Pastorek

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