Thursday, May 11, 2006

Darren's 10 Favorite 'Will and Grace' Episodes!

I'll do an Alias tribute later this week, then the following week a complete review of all the shows I watch during the year. Yip yip.

Will and Grace's final episode airs Thursday May 18th. A once fresh and funny TV show has made a turn for the worse in the past 2 years. Season 4 was easily its strongest year. The show has won 14 Emmys, including ones for the series and all four of its principle players. I'll focus on the best of this groundbreaking and hilarious show. Some people really detest this show and I concur that its style is not for everyone. The over-the-top characters and possibly too-gay humor are a putoff to some. But, when you try to make something for everyone, you end up pleasing no one - to steal a line from Karen Walker. What's interesting about this show is that I actually can't stand any of the 4 main actors. They are cliched theatre actors who talk and drone endlessly on about their "craft." To quote Grace, they are pretentious boobs. But I love their on-screen characters. Karen is probably my favorite. I quote her at least once a week. I'll wager that Mullally is probably the most talented of the foursome and the most likely to go on and do something worthwhile after this. I think I'm more like Grace though. We are both self-centered in a way that we think is cute but is more cloying. And we know food. Anywho, I'm hoping for a half decent finale in which every character gets a happy ending. And a positive sendoff. Tehehehe.

Below are my ten favorite episodes:

(Thanks to IMDB and TV.com for the info! For an extensive list of Will and Grace quotes, go here.)

Will Truman: Eric McCormick
Grace Adler: Debra Messing
Jack McFarland: Sean Hayes
Karen Walker: Megan Mullally

Recurring Characters:
Rosario: Shelley Morrison
Leo: Harry Connick Jr
Rob: Tom Gallop
Ellen: Leigh-Allyn Baker
Joe: Jerry Levine
Larry: Tim Bagley
Elliot: Michael Angarano
Tina: Leslie Ann Warren
Bobbi: Debbie Reynolds
Marilyn: Blythe Danner
George: Syndey Pollack
Lorraine Finster: Minnie Driver
Lyle Finster: John Cleese
Nurse Sheila: Laura Kightlinger
Vince: Bobby Cannavale
Zandra: Eileen Brennan (probably my fave recurring character!)
Nathan: Woody Harrelson
Beverly Leslie: Leslie Jordan
Ben Doucette: Gregory Hines
Mr. Zamir: Marshall Manesh
Val Bassett: Molly Shannon
Dorleen: Parker Posey
and Cher as herself.

10. "THE HOSPITAL SHOW"
Airdate: March 28, 2000
Synopsis: While on a blind date, Will finds out that Karen's husband Stan has had a heart attack and rushes to the hospital to be with the gang. Will, Jack, Grace, and Rosario all speculate on who Karen will turn to for her inevitable emotional breakdown. After all, who will pay the bills if Stan dies?

Why is it so great? This was actually one of the first episodes of the show I saw. Jennifer Elise Cox (Jan from The Brady Bunch movies) appears as a very young nurse who frightens the needle-weary Grace.

Quotes:
Karen: It's Stan. He needs blood for a bypass. And... he needs it drawn slowly by a large pointy needle.
Grace: Um... Um, I - I - I - I doubt that - that I would even match. I've got - I've got a very rare blood type.
Karen: I'm sure it'll be fine.
Grace: What type do they need?
Karen: What type do you have?
Grace: What type do they need?
Karen: What type do you have?
Grace: Um, AB-negative.
Karen: That's the type they need.

Will: No, we're not being gross. Besides, it's either this or 15 hours of reading Highlights magazine. I mean, really, how many times can you find a toaster in a tree?

Grace: Whoa, whoa, her? Isn't there someone who's a little more... experienced? Someone who didn't drive in on a Big Wheel?
Nurse Trainee Pittman: Oh, I don't drive. I keep taking the test over and over, but I'm all, "This is hard."


9. "QUEENS FOR A DAY"
Airdate: November 25, 2004
Synopsis: When Vince's mother injures her leg and is unable to make her traditional Italian Thanksgiving, Will comes to the rescue by offering to make his own special dinner, but Vince's mother refuses to give Will any credit. Meanwhile, Jack gives Vince's sister Ro a few pointers on a big secret she is keeping from her family and fiance. Meanwhile, Grace and Karen get very cosy with Vince's much younger brother. (This is an hourlong episode.)
Guest star: Jamie Lynn Sigler

Why is it so great? Just try not to laugh while Hayes attempts to sit on Vince's families plastic covered furniture. Easily the best episode of the past two seasons, too and the best Holiday-episode of the series.

Ro: He went to camp with Renee Zellweger. But that's not the only reason I'm marrying him.
(Later)
Ro: He went to camp with Renee Zellweger. It's the only reason I'm marrying him.

Jack: Hello Ro. He-Ro! I'm Jack, Will's friend. Not like Will and your brother are "friends." Okay. And one day they'll eventually be "roommates." And then the proud parents of a Chinese girl.


8. "CROUCHING FATHER, HIDDEN HUSBAND"
Airdate: October 11, 2001
Synopsis: Jack is puffed up with paternal pride as he escorts his long-lost teenaged son Elliot to a junior high school dance but not before he coerces Grace into posing as Elliot's date – which only revives her own tortured memories of rejection from school dances many years before. Elsewhere, Karen has great fun at her lawyer Will's expense when she continues to capriciously summon him for bogus "emergencies" – that is, until she really needs him.

Why is it so great? This ep boasts the great chemistry of the infrequently coupled Karen and Will. Mostly at each other's throats - and no exception here - the two work very well together.

Quotes:
(Elliot is talking to his potential girlfriend at the school dance, after Jack has upstaged the event by dancing to N'Sync.)
Elliot: That's my dad. He's gay.
Nancy: One of my moms is gay. She can't dance. She built our house.

Grace (at the dance to two outcast girls she is telling the evils of men): Am I the flatest one here?

Karen (on phone with Will): Will? It’s me. There are two men from the FBI here. Well one man and a man-ish woman!

Will: What happened? Did your cable go out? Did you lose the stick you use to poke bears with at the zoo?
Karen: No, honey. It’s right here!


7. "SWIMMING POOLS, MOVIE STARS"
Airdate: January 11, 2001
Synopsis: Will and Grace get carried away in an escrow undertow when they pose as a wealthy couple shopping for homes of the rich-and-famous and visit Sandra Bernhard's posh townhouse where they become fast friends and make an fake offer -- but their ploy fizzles when she accepts their offer. Elsewhere, Karen is forced to attend her young stepson's swim meet and is uncharacteristically chastised by another mother for arriving late.
Guest star: Sandra Bernhard

Why is it so great? Four words: Midnight. Train. To. Georgia. Messing's finest moment and one of the few moments in any comedy that can make me laugh hard every time.

Quotes:
Karen: Good Lord. I can't believe I'm at a public pool. Why doesn't somebody just pee directly on me?

Cheryl: Mrs. Walker? Cheryl Bricker-Fossberg, Taylor and Hayden's mom.
Karen: I have no idea what you just said.

Sandra: Hi kids!

Karen: Hey poodle, love your scooter.
Jack: Thanks. Love your hooters.


6. "GIRL TROUBLE"
Airdate: October 26, 2000
Synopsis: Grace's delight in having a bright intern whom she can mentor turns into horror when the young woman re-makes herself into the spitting image of sassy, brassy Karen -- and that's at least one too many Karens to handle. Meanwhile, Will and Jack volunteer to act out scenes for a gay sensitivity seminar for the local police but the peaceful intent is lost when they tussle with two lesbian cast members who strongly object to their non-inclusive, sexist language.
Guest star: Natasha Lyonne

Why is it so great? Karen has always bashed Grace, but this is the ultimate Karen-bashes-Grace episode. Lyonne is priceless as Karen Jr.

Quotes:
Karen: [to Gillian the intern] Hi, honey. Sit down!
Gillian: What's going on, what's happening, what's this all about?
Karen: I've got something tough to tell you. Uh, I'm fabulous, okay? I'm an incredible dresser, I've got buckets of money, I'm a hoot and a half, and I've got a killer rack. Do you get what I'm saying?
Gillian: Not really.
Karen: Honey, you're not me, and you never will be.
Gillian: [pointing to her chest] Is it the rack?
Karen: [laughing and shaking her head] "It's a big part of it. Now, you're never going to be me, but, you got a good chance to be Grace, and that's nothing to sneeze at, honey, you shouldn't throw it away so quickly."
Gillian: But Grace, she's just not us.
Karen: Bup-bupbupbupbupbup, watch your mouth, or I'll wash it out with cheap vodka. That's my little girl you're talking about. Now, Grace is a damn good role model. She's bright, she's successful, she's the worst dresser in the whole wide world, she's talented and I look up to her. Honey, why else would I be here?
Gillian: You told me it's because you hate being home with Stan and the kids.
Karen: [laughing and shaking her head] It's a big part of it.
Gillian: Hey, can I still use the word "honey"?
Karen: What? Ohhhhhhhh no.

Gillian: [talking about Karen] She sends me to the coolest places, right? I mean, like yesterday. She sent me to Tiffany's and Barney's. She even sent me to the dog groomer to get the gray out of her poodle. Well... they couldn't because, well, it's a gray poodle.

Karen: OK, rule number one. Unless you're served in a frosted glass, never come within four feet of my lips.

Gillian: Grace, honey, that color doesn't even look good on an orange.


5. "GIRLS, INTERRUPTED"
Airdate: May 2, 2000
Synopsis: Despite their history, Grace spends a fun evening with Val only to have Will suspect her of stealing. Meanwhile Jack becomes attracted to the leader of Welcome Home-an organization for gays who have converted to going straight, so he acts straight to woo the man.
Guest star: Molly Shannon, Neil Patrick Harris

Why is it so great? While the whole ex-gay movement has reared its ugly head more in recent years, this clever take on it - they are actually there as a hookup service - really soars. There's a great dig at Kevin Spacey and Jodie Foster to boot. Molly Shannon can crack me up doing anything. Watch how she subtely gets a laugh just switching cups on Will and Grace when they go to her apartment. Her "IT'S MINE!" bit is the episode's high point, though. Fun fact: Focus on the Family objected to this episode as it mocks the struggles of ex-gays. HAHAHAHAHAH!

Quotes:
Karen: They're trying to make gay people straight! Good Lord! Don't they know what that'll do to the fall line?

Karen: And it looks like your new sweetie has turned his back on homosexuals. And not in the good way.

Val: I hope you like Sunny D!
Grace: I Sunny Doo!

Karen: It's a cult, like the Moonies, or the homeless.


4. "23"
Airdate: May 8, 2003
Synopsis: In the middle of her divorce proceedings, Karen learns that ex-husband Stan has suddenly passed away, and the funeral becomes a contest of wills between Karen and her British rival, and a free-for-all when the will is read for everyone who ever felt deserving, such as Will. Meanwhile, Grace is shocked when recently returned husband Leo is called back into service by Doctors Without Borders and asks her to make the trip with him to Guatemala.
Guest star: Minnie Driver

Why is it so great? Driver is really funny. There's a nifty reference to Gilmore Girls and the hilarious yet never seen Stan gets a great send off.

Quotes:
Karen: Nice outfit for a funeral. If that outfit were any shorter I could see your English muffin.
Lorraine Finster: I wouldn't talk. If that dress were any lower I could see your Yankee doodles.

Will: Stanley Walker was a great man.
Grace: A nice man.
Jack: A FAT man.
Will: He was a decent man.
Grace: A kind man.
Jack: A surprisingly good dancer.

Karen (to Lorraine): I'd like you to eat me.

Lorraine: You're a fancy dresser. Are you English?
Will: Oh no, I'm gay.
Lorraine: Well, its the same thing.
Will: If that weren't true, I'd find that offensive.


3. "SOMEONE OLD, SOMEPLACE NEW"
Airdate: February 28, 2002
Synopsis: Will and Grace feel they need more elbow room, so they search for larger digs and find an exquisite place—despite the efforts of Sandra Bernhard—but to finance the move, they illegally sub-let their old apartment. Meanwhile, a well-intentioned Jack begins filming a documentary of Karen's colorful life to celebrate her birthday but accidentally stumbles upon her estranged, lowlife mom.
Guest star: Sandra Bernhard, Suzanne Pleshette

Why is it so great? So many great lines. The way W&G react to the friendly kid in the one building the visit is priceless and probably the closest the characters have ever resembled myself.

Quotes:
Jack (filming at W&G's): We're here at the apartment sex forgot.

Grace: Karen paid me $20 a day for a month not to wear ruffles or eat ruffles.

Jack: I'll have a Scotch on the rocks, half crushed ice, half cubed.
Lois: A beer.
Jack: Excuse me, rudeness! I would like the drink I ordered, and maybe even a 'Hi my name is phbbt, I'll be your server this evening.'
Lois: Listen, Maria. I've been on this shift since, what time is it now? 1947. My feet hurt, my back aches, and the only thing holding my boobs up is hope. Now you're going to enjoy the drink you get.
Jack: . . . Beer will be fine.

Jack: Karen, I got you what I believe, pants-down, is the best birthday gift ever!
Karen: Oh, honey, is it my new liver?

Sandra: What are you two "Kate and Leopold"-looking mother f****rs doing here?


2. "A CHORUS LIE"
Airdate: February 7, 2002
Synopsis: Matt Damon makes a guest appearance as a clever charmer named Owen, who's competing against Jack for a spot in New York's Gay Men's Chorus. Truth be told, however, Owen is totally straight and is really after the group's big perk: a summer trip to Europe, all-expenses paid. Jack suspects Owen's ruse but needs proof. How about the hug test? Now a flustered Jack reluctantly turns to Grace to "in" Owen. Meanwhile, a scheming Karen tries to pass off an unwitting Will as her lover and not her lawyer when she discovers that she's the object of pity for being single at her own Valentine's Day party.
Guest star: Matt Damon

Why is it so great? Yes, this show has become an endless parade of guest stars. I will argue that Damon is easily the series' strongest one-ep appearance.

Quotes:
Karen (to the pint sized Beverly Leslie): Shouldn't you be in a tree making cookies?

Jack (upon learning Owen is straight): Anne Heche Laffoon! He's straight.

(Just for Angie)
Owen: Whoops, my hand seems to be traveling up your thigh towards your ROCKIN' ASS. But who cares right? Cause I'm gay. So it's all right if I tell you you're beautiful, throw you down on this couch and make out with you fiercely, right?
Grace: Yup, because you're gay, I should be on top.
[Start making out]
Grace: Ya know, you're a good kisser for a gay guy, and I've kissed a lot gay guys.
[enter Jack with camera]
Jack: Got you, you sick straight bastard.
Grace: Jack get lost, I'm not done.

Jack: Wishin' and a-Hopin'...
Owen: Dreamin' and a-Prayin'...
Jack: Lyin' and a-Cheatin'.
Owen: Fatty and a-Tone Deaf.
Jack: - STOP IT.

Jack: Uh, excuse me. As Aretha said to Gloria, Celine, Shania, and Mariah during Divas Live...
[in an Aretha voice]
Jack: "Are you trippin'? No one interrupts the Queen of Soul, bitch. OK?"
Owen: Well, I believe she also said, "Hey, Cuba, Canada, Cowgirl, Crazy, get out of my light and away from my snacks, bitch."


1. "LAST EX TO BROOKLYN"
Airdate: October 2, 2003
Synopsis: When Leo invites his hip and trendy ex-girlfriend to a friendly dinner party, Grace turns to Will, Jack and Karen to round out the guest list and keep the night running smoothly. However, when Leo's ex turns out to be the only girl Will ever slept with, Grace's jealousy gets the better of her. Meanwhile, Karen discovers Lorraine's dog Chompers hiding in Stan's closet and searches for a new owner for the puppy.
Guest star: Mira Sorvino

Why is it so great? All four cast members are at their comedic high. Even the typically passable Connick is solid. However, the fact that just about every line in this episode is instantly quoteable, that it is a classic sitcom episode setup, and that Sorvino is perfectly cast make this the best episode. Of a sitcom. Period.

Quotes:
Diane: (comparing Leo and Will's performances in bed) Will was better.
Will: Yes!
Leo: What do you mean "Will was better"? He couldn't find a G-spot with Yahoo! Maps.
Jack and Karen: Yahoo-oo!

(Karen and Jack enter the cafe where they approach two men drinking coffee)
Karen: Hi, Will! Hi, Grace!
Jack: Grace, I like your new crew cut.
(Seconds later, Karen and Jack spot Will and Grace and go to the table)
Karen: Hi, Will! Hi, Grace!
Jack: Grace, I like your new crew cut.

Diane: You spun me right round, baby. Right round, like a record player. Right round, round, round.

Will: [telling Grace how she's lucky she didn't have sex with him] Yeah, a ride on the Truman train could have ruined you for life.
Leo: Train? Train? You had one passenger.
Will: Yeah, but at least she got off.

Leo: Silly me. I thought two bottles of wine per person would be enough.
Karen: Maybe if we were in high school.

Jack: Leo, she doesn't have ca-bobs. She has a ca-gina.
Karen: And nice ca-tits.

Will (to Diane): How did you know I was gay?
Karen: Probably because you put the condom on with your pinkies up, Mary.

And here it is....

the Quote that pretty much defines this show for me:

"I like you. Wanna make out?"

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